Sands of time (Part 5)

Written By

Geeta Yadav

Sands of time Loading

(Contd from part 4)

“Change, I realise is primarily a woman’s responsibility. She is naturally empowered to be like the Sun; at the centre, with family members revolving around her magnanimity like planets.”

I turned in my bed but my thoughts did not lose focus. They took my attention to the all powerful position of a woman. Yes! A woman is … Oh! My God! The shadows lifted one by one through a divine intervention and a poetic flow of thoughts came my way.

I am one with nature’s secretive trail,

She has chosen me to be in the paradoxical loop,

Yes! For often I aid to evolve and then dissolve,

I am the chosen one for nature shared her womb,

To let me know that I was bound to creation not tomb,

My consciousness is in tune with her manifestation,

For Nature helps me revise evolution in gestation.

Ah! I was quite amazed at my revelation and next the cuckoo called out from the wilderness as if coaxing me to dole out the power that I was made up of. The power of unconditional love is the only harbinger of change for it moves mountains of clutter and pain; it melts the glaciers of wounded ego and reinvents new social orders. I whispered in the silence of the dawn, “I am love that got messed up in time. Ah! I am love and love can make the world go round and set everything right.”

Something stirred deep within and a soothing silence took over. I looked within to find light and my little desires were nowhere in sight. My past was my destiny but my future, my free will. My intuitiveness was at its best and now I knew my way. I freshened up and dressed up in no time. I chose to go directly to our outhouse that looked lonely and forlorn for want of some light. Deep in thought I didn’t come to know when Atul and Jia came to stand by my side. Atul tapped my shoulder and I turned around to hear myself say, “Atul, I want you to act fast. On my 70th birthday, I want to invite our loved ones for a photo shoot here. Jia will be our photographer for the day and then we will inaugurate this place as her studio. Now don’t waste time for I will turn 70 in a week’s time. I am sure I haven’t asked for a lot.”

Atul was bewildered and Jia looked shocked. I took her by her arm and strolled around till the two of us reached the swing in our garden. I pushed her gently on it and went around it. Then slowly I moved the swing to and fro and told her, “Jia, if you could just look ahead and start afresh. It’s time to be a role model for Sana. Tullika is all set and fine. Now it’s your turn to look ahead and allow yourself to make up for all the opportunities you lost to the sands of time.”

With this I sauntered back into the house. Atul was leaving for office but suddenly he looked at me and smiled. We didn’t talk but communicated enough for a lifetime. He didn’t touch my feet but came forward and hugged me. I had simply set him free since preparing for my birthday bash meant fulfilling Jia’s dream. All these years he was trapped in the barbs of a silent allegiance that a son owes to his mother. In the bargain his young wife lurked in the neglected corners of life. How well I understood this psychological pattern for this was just an action replay from a life that I had lived with my husband Naresh.

I went up to my room. I threw open the window and stood there for a while. I was about to turn 70 and determined to leave footprints behind. The bougainvillea vine greeted me, as today it got a chance to rest on the bars of my window. It looked like a visitor who had waited long enough to meet me. I touched the cluster of flowers gently and bent down to kiss its thorny form. Silently the vine lay in my warmth and lovingly communicated a message to me.

“I wish I had an easy life and caring souls by my side. It has been a quite a struggle, Shami. I wish I could share it with someone like you who would understand.”

I smiled tenderly at the vine that grew so beautifully amidst thorns, flowers, hardships and people who felt it didn’t need care. I cradled the vine for a long time and then went back to pen down something so that it would never ever pine.

You’ve been there stout and strong,

Spread out, gracious and vibrant, yet wronged.

You blossomed when it was sunny and dry,

Covering the walkway with flowers for all.

Being utterly patient from spring to fall,

For you are love that expands to grow,

Through thick and thin, it spreads its glow.

I put my pen down and let out a sigh. I feel better, much better and I know why. I have shed my pain and anguish by paving the way for all to love, be free and live every moment. I need not run away for I am rooted in my free will and now I know …

Freedom from what,

           And,

Freedom from whom,

When the shackles are within me,

When my inhibitions curtail me,

When my voice fails me.

Come back next week to read the concluding part – part 6 and see what Shami does to ensure the happiness of her family.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I am a writer by choice. I’ve been writing for the past 18 years. Luckily my creative writing skills were enhanced as varied opportunities came my way. If contributing to newspapers groomed me to honour deadlines, then writing books for school children rekindled the spirit to enquire, question and explore. My experiences as a mum have been interesting and entertaining and found expression in my blogs with poems on Parenting for a website called www.mybabycart.com. I know that God loves me and keeps me so energetic and alive through thick and thin. My gratefulness finds expression in my service activities and writing for the Art Of Living Foundation and White Print ( a magazine for the visually impaired).

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