Ma Thoughts: When Mom Created My Matrimonial Site Profile

When my mom created my shaadi.com profile-06 Loading

Editor’s note: Suchitra, guest author on the Ma Thoughts series, tells a funny tale of a mother playing matchmaker with the help of modern technology, much to the annoyance of her daughter. Write to us with your experiences.

“I am home!” I called out to my mom. I knew she was already home from work. I could see her new, shiny pair of skechers on the shoe rack. She wore nothing except that nowadays. When I asked her why, she told me they were very comfortable and therefore ideal for the long hours of standing at work. It was true, but it was also because I’d bought them and she was a proud mother flaunting them at her workplace. I know this because she did something similar when my brother had bought her a Movado watch last year.

I took my own sweet time to freshen up and go to the kitchen. I knew I would have to help her make dinner once I was there. Work had been busy that day and I was hoping she’d finished preparing dinner already. When I finally reached the kitchen, she was peeling potatoes so I automatically started washing and chopping them. While we were halfway through preparing dinner, she said, “I did it”. I was too tired to figure out what she was referring to. “Did what?” I asked, not too interested to know honestly. “I created your shaadi.com profile”, she replied. It was like someone had splashed a bucket of cold water on my face. My tiredness disappeared all of a sudden and she had my full attention.

“You did what?” I asked, incredulous, even though I heard her perfectly the first time. “I created your shaadi.com profile. Don’t make me repeat myself again” she stated, irritably. I couldn’t believe my ears. We had this discussion last night and I had flatly refused to become part of this matrimonial master plan that was forming (or probably had already fully formed) in my mom’s head.  “OK. I can’t stop you from creating my profile but I sure as hell can refuse to check or respond to any of the messages I get. You can’t force me!” I replied, a tone higher than usual. “I did what I had to. It is your choice now,” she said and I knew this conversation was over.

A few weeks passed and I had completely forgotten about the drama that took place until the day I clicked on the shaadi.com tab while browsing on my laptop. Somebody, and by ‘somebody’ I mean my mom, had forgotten to log out. It was the first time I saw my profile. Mom had chosen one of my recent photos in a green anarkali as my profile picture. “Good choice!” I thought to myself. I couldn’t resist checking out the other photos she had uploaded. I was wearing a pair of jeans with a white shirt in one and a cute black polka dot dress in another. I approvingly noted that Mom was trying to convey the message to prospective grooms that I was a modern-yet-traditional girl. Now I was absolutely intrigued. This made me wonder if she actually had “accidentally” forgotten to log out.  I went on to read the ‘About me’ section. The introduction that she had written about me was spot on! It was exactly what I would have written about myself.

There were other details like age, city of residence, etc. Something caught my eye, the number ‘65’. Anger and embarrassment overwhelmed me when I realized it was my weight. WEIGHT? How can something so personal be displayed in full public view? Completely incensed, I ran up to her bedroom and confronted her.

“So? That’s correct, isn’t it?” she asked, unperturbed by my heated accusations. “First it’s personal and secondly, you’re wrong! I weigh 63 kilos!” I ranted. “You weighed 63 kilos months ago honey, you have gained weight after your Portugal trip,” was her response. GOD! How evil could this woman be? She was treading on dangerous ground now. My weight was a sensitive topic and nobody, not even my mom could make fun of it. I slammed her bedroom door shut on my way out to convey my displeasure.

                                                                                 ***

How does this mother-daughter tussle turn out? Does the Mom have her way, or does the profile get deleted? Find out next week!

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Suchitra Yerukonda, a Software Engineer, currently lives in the USA with her husband. A bubbly girl whose life revolves around her family and friends, Suchitra's hobbies include reading, dancing, singing, traveling and trying out different cuisines. She's passionate about cooking and follows Dalai Lama’s instructions for life: “Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon”. Writing happened to her recently and Suchitra continues to explore it.

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