An Eye-Opener about 10 Types of Obnoxious Blind Dates

Written By

Aditi Bose

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I can understand dates because you know what to expect. But a blind date? What if a frog came to meet you instead of the man you were supposed to meet? No amount of kissing would change the frogs to princes, I suspect! This is what I had once tried to tell a friend of mine. It didn’t work. She decided that she wanted to try it. I guess, after a heartbreak, one’s heart tends to want to do risky things. But I was right. She came back home that night in less than an hour. Most of the time having been spent in maneuvering her car through the Delhi traffic. The date? The moment she saw him from a distance, she ran! We spent the rest of the night analyzing the different types of blind dates that a girl could encounter. Here’s our list.

  1. The Ugly

Yes, love can make you blind. But, for that, first you have to be in love. During a blind date you haven’t really been struck by cupid’s arrow yet. So, quite naturally, your eyes can still differentiate the good looking from the ugly. And, no matter how much some groups cry themselves hoarse, if the dude is not a looker, the blind date can go for a blind toss.

  1. The Fake

It’s so easy to be Tom Cruise online. But when the time comes for the face-to-face meeting, the bloke might just be related to a chimpanzee — both in terms of looks and behavior. Now, who would want to spend precious time with a fake when there’s still some honesty left in the world?

  1. The Stalker

It’s not too nice to sit with a stranger who already knows everything about you — right from the fact that you wear your perfume only on the right wrist to the way you leave the last forkful of food on the plate no matter what. Instead of enjoying the date, you’re left worrying  which detective agency he’s employed with.  No way! It’s better to pick that purse up and run away from that stalker.

  1. The Stingy

You might be the girl who loves her independence. But when out on a blind date, you’d like the man to pay. Maybe that’s the way of our subconscious to judge. So, if the date says he wants to split the bill or simply stares at your face in the most romantic way possible when the cheque arrives, then don’t bother going for the second un-blind date with him. Try your luck elsewhere.

  1. The Drinker

It’s alright to savour a drink. But if he’s the sort who loves his alcohol so much that he doesn’t mind showing it the very first time you meet or even forces you to gulp down more than you want to, then don’t play the blind game with him any further. Open your eyes and see the solidified alcohol that’s sitting in front of you. One part of you might say that he’s not hiding his true self and is being honest with you. Of course one must be glad that there’s still some honesty left in the world, but that doesn’t mean you’re obliged to spend more time than you have to with this brand of drunken honesty!

  1. The OCD 

Your date’s going well and you are having a good time. Then you find that he’s correcting the angle at which you have placed your fork and knife after you are done. And suddenly you notice more. The way he perfectly folds the napkin and keeps it beside the plate. The way he takes back the credit card and wipes it with his kerchief before putting it back into the wallet. Etc., etc., etc. You wonder how far his OCD goes. What if he asks you to sterilize your mouth before each kiss? Na! He’s not the blind date worth betting on.

  1. The Crazy 

What if your date tells you that once you finish eating you are supposed to run out? Or tells you that the both of you should scream in the middle of the road after he’s a few drinks down? This is the type of crazy man who will turn your blind dates into ones you would be happy to forget.

  1. The Sorry

It’s nice to be with a man who is gentle, polite and chivalrous. But a constant stream of apology for no reason is just going to turn you into a sorry state. Imagine having to hear him apologize for the restaurant being crowded, for your type of music not being played, for the slow service, for the non-availability of your brand of vodka. Endless list and endless ‘sorry’s. You can surely do without this one.

  1. The Hormonal

This is the dangerous blind date. His hormonal urges are so strong that he wants to be all over you the moment he is certain that you belong to the opposite gender. Stay away. After all you had come for a date with a man and not to be with a leech that wants to stick all parts of his body to you.

  1. The No-Show

Saved the best for last. This is the one who doesn’t even let you get started on your date. He just doesn’t show up at the designated time and place. Maybe this is the best type of blind date. After all he gets you to the right place where you can hunt down plenty of other options.

So, the next time you want to tie the kerchief around your eyes and head towards meeting the elusive dark knight, beware of what you might meet when you remove the blindfold!

(…But don’t despair, luck does favour a few though!)

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Aditi Ray Bose is the author of the romance novels 'My Dream Man' and 'This Time It's Forever'. She does a lot of content writing for various national and international websites. And when she's not typing on her laptop or weaving stories then she's doing what she loves to do the most - being a mother to her daughter.

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